A Poem About Manic Psychosis

Who Am I? Who Am I? Well fuck, that’s a loaded question. My name is Brittany Gushue and the thing that seems to define me the most and the topic to which this blog is dedicated to is the fact that I suffer from Bipolar Type One. I believe what makes me the best person to educate and bring to light topics of mental health is my firsthand experience with this disorder and all its pitfalls and actually believe it or not, benefits. I have learned a lot in my twenty eight years on this earth but the fundamental truth I am most thankful for learning is to never take anything for granted – especially your sanity. I have been hospitalized on three separate occasions, twice for manic psychosis and once for depression. I have experienced the soaring highs and crippling lows of the bipolar pendulum and I can honestly say I don’t know which is worse. I’ve had delusions of grandeur, hallucinations and paranoia as a result of my illness. I believe these things make me fundamentally more grounded as a person for having lost my sanity, not once but twice, I write from nothing resembling a high horse. I am currently an aspiring author and am working on a manuscript detailing my journey from sanity to insanity, and then back again. A fun fact about me is that I once genuinely believed I was a millionaire with boat loads of cash and luxury cars at my disposal when in reality I was living off welfare. I’ve spent more time in the psych ward than most will ever spend in a hospital in general. I am certifiable but best believe I own that shit. The thing that connects me to you, my reader, however is that at the very core of it I am human just like you. I’ve experienced love, loss, fear and everything in between. I write from a place of experience when addressing mental health. I want you to understand if nothing else that your illness does not define you. You are undeniably you, flaws and all. Embrace that shit!And remember you are never completely alone in this. There are people like me who have been there and have come out better for it on the other side. More than anything, I want to say, “I hope you’re down for the ride” that is this blog. xoxoxoxox, BiPolarMania View all posts by FearANDSelf-Loathing