The Power of “The Power Of Now”

the power of now

“The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle is the ultimate self-help book in which you are encouraged to bring your mind to consciousness, the present moment and to let go of the illusions of past and future. After all, you only really ever get this moment. I am glad I read this book and am already practicing honing in on the present but I will be completely honest the thought never crossed my mind to pick up this book until I had seen it on a list of the twenty-five best self-help books. I am glad I did though and can honestly say “The Power of Now” has the power to change your life and the way you view it.

Tolle explains that there are two levels to your pain that you are harboring: the pain you create now and the pain from the past. He believes you can eliminate this pain and suffering by accepting what is:

“The pain that you create now is always some form of nonacceptance, some form of unconscious resistance to what is. On the level of thought, the resistance is some form of judgement. On the emotional level it is some form of negativity. The intensity of the pain depends on the degree of resistance to the present moment…The mind always seeks to deny the Now and to escape from it…The more you are able to honor and accept the Now, the more you are free of pain, of suffering” (Tolle 33) Tolle outlines the cause of emotional pain and suffering as a resistance to the present moment.

People will continue to suffer this emotional burden of pain if they continue to cover up the present moment with the past. People tend to “ignore or deny that precious moment or reduce it to a means of getting to some future moment, which only exists in the mind, never in actuality” (Tolle 34). The main cause of emotional pain is the fixation on the past or future which do not exist. How many times have we wallowed about what has been instead of focusing on what  is? I know, I for one, have gotten caught up in my past and my failings such as the loss of a job or relationship and do not accept it for what it is and let go. I hold on to that pain because it’s what I know. It’s a comfortable pain since I can expect it and depend on it but rather I could be focusing on the Now, the potential of this moment. I could be doing something positive for my life circumstance in the present such as researching schools and reapplying to programs in the area, instead of getting caught up on my past of being forced to drop out from University years ago.

The past is an illusion, it’s already come to pass and so it no longer exists. The future is also an illusion that simply exists in the mind and never actually coming to fruition. I could become anxious about the future and how maybe I will fail again at school so easily, overcome by dark fantasies. The fact of the matter is that has not happened and save me the “yet” because it very well may never. The only thing that matters is the present because it is in the present that you can take action. There is no sense being anxious about a situation you have literally created in your head, now that’s just insanity.

The following statements from Tolle are a bit of a mind-fuck but it illustrates my point and he says it better than I could ever get it across myself: “Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now. Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now. What you think of the past is a memory trace, stored in the mind of a former Now. When you think about the future, you do it now” (Tolle 50).

Tolle also discusses doing things in the Now without looking for a future reward and simply enjoying the moment. He claims that when you do this your attention will be more focused on the task at hand and therefore you will carry it out more effectively: “As soon as you honour the present moment, all unhappiness and struggle dissolve , and life begins to flow with joy and ease. When you act out of present-moment awareness, whatever you do becomes imbued with a sense of quality, care and love – even the most simple action” (Tolle 68). When you do something for the sake of doing it, you no longer add the pretense or pressure of a future outcome from it. Simply doing becomes more enjoyable and brings an inner peace not found before. When you focus and hone in on the present moment, you are living your life to its fullest potential and doing so with grace.

Tolle states that: “When the compulsive striving away from the Now ceases, the joy of Being flows into everything you do. The moment your attention turns to the Now, you feel a presence, a stillness, a peace. You no longer depend on the future for fulfillment and satisfaction. Therefore, you are not attached to the results. Neither failure nor success has the power to change your inner state of Being” (Tolle 68). By accessing the Now, you access peace, peace from emotional suffering. You become more in tune with yourself and less run by your incessant thoughts. Failure no longer has power over you because you accept what is and move past that. You become whole.

The book itself is posed in a question and answer format with questions from Tolle’s seminars, meditation classes, and private counseling sessions. The answers are provided obviously by Tolle. The question that struck me the most while reading this book was the following: “In that state of wholeness, would we still be able or willing to pursue external goals?” This question raises a good point because if we were truly content and “whole” why change the moment by striving for something more?

Tolle’s answer is profound: “Of course, but you will not have illusory expectations that anything or anybody in the future will save you or make you happy. As far as your life situation is concerned, there may be things to be attained or acquired. That’s
the world of form, of gain and loss. Yet on a deeper level you are already complete, and when you realize that, there is a playful, joyous, energy behind what you do. Being free of psychological time, you no longer pursue your goals with grim determination driven by fear, anger, discontent, or the need to become someone. Nor will you remain
inactive through fear of failure, which to the ego is loss of self. When your deeper sense of self is derived from Being , when you are free of “becoming” as a psychological need, neither your happiness nor your sense of self depends on the outcome ” (Tolle 69).

When you are ever present in the present moment you do not hold on to past resentments towards people and things that happened in your life that led you to this moment and current life situation. You will also not idealize the future as some place where you have what you want or think you need for you will be in the moment, accepting that moment for what it is. You are already complete (let that sink in), you are meant to be where you are, in this moment. When you realize this you will feel the joy Tolle is describing or “happiness” as it were.

Tolle also raises a good point that people seem to be in a perpetual state of waiting, waiting to start living their life: “Waiting is a state of mind. Basically it means that you want the future; you don’t want the present. You don’t want what you’ve got , and you
want what you haven’t got. For example many people are waiting for prosperity. It cannot come in the future. When you honor, acknowledge and fully
accept your present reality – where you are, who you are, what you are doing right now – when you fully accept what you have got, you are grateful for what you have got, grateful for what is, grateful for being” (Tolle 86).

You are grateful for Being when you do not look to the future for things that can be attained to make your life seem better. Accept what you have already got and you will be infinitely happier. It’s not a new concept since people have been spouting this perspective for years, decades even – to be grateful for what you have and to not focus on what you do not. I find writing a Gratitude Journal each day helps with this and it doesn’t need to be lengthy. Write down three things you are grateful for today. I’ll start: I am grateful for my ears so I can hear the lovely Russell Brand narrating his book “Recovery” on the audiotape I have, I am grateful for the taste of coffee and appreciate it immensely, and finally  I am grateful for the relationships I have currently in my life that have showed me so much love. When you take the time to write three things out, you realize wow, there really are things in my life in which to be grateful  even if they are the simple things like the taste of coffee. Another thing is to remember that there is someone out there envying your life. And yes you heard me right! There is someone, somewhere, envying your life no  matter how much you think it’s mundane or problem-riddled. At least your love one is not going off to a war you’re unsure they will ever return from, At least you live in a country with basic freedoms and rights. Think about that when you’re busy regretting your past or looking to the future for some ideal life that is but an illusion.

So the question becomes, How do we ground ourselves in the present moment? How do we bring our consciousness to the Now? Tolle offers some advice and strategies for such a thing: “To become conscious of Being, you need to reclaim consciousness of the mind…A very effective way of doing this is simply to take the focus of your attention away from thinking and direct it into the body” (Tolle 110). He further elaborates a way in which you can focus on your body as a gateway to the Now: “Direct your attention into the body. Feel it from within. Is it alive? Is there life in your hands, arms, legs and feet – in your abdomen, your chest?…Keep focusing on the feeling of your inner body for a few moments. Do not start to think about it. Feel it. The more attention you give it , the clearer and stronger this feeling will become. It will feel as if every cell is becoming
more alive” (Tolle 112).

If you connect to your body in this manner and reflect on it, you are brought into the Now. The stream of unconsciousness, or rather your incessant thinking will quiet. Your attention will be on the current moment and what your body is feeling such as the sharp intake of air and exhale of recycled air. This connection to your body is a channel to the present moment. Tolle says that while doing this: “thoughts and emotions, fears and desires, may still be there to some extent, but they won’t take you over” (Tolle 117).

The mind is conditioned by the past and can become stuck in it, denying the Now. The mind dislikes and ignores the present moment because it is caught in a trap of the familiar, the past. Even if the past was full of pain or it brings pain to think about, the mind will continue to focus and re-create it because it is familiar. The mind would rather deal with the known (the pain) than something unknown because that is scary due to the lack of control one has over something unknown. That unknown, however, and embrace of the present moment could be and no arguably is, the gateway to freedom from pain. It is insanity to keep trying the same thing over and over again expecting different results. So embrace Now, be grateful for Now and who you are in this present moment. Let go of the past and future for they do not truly exist in  this moment. They are but fathoms of your conditioned mind. Embrace the Now, because it is truly all you get. Tomorrow may never come and that is a reality some find hard to admit.

I am ending this blog post with the last few lines of “The Power of Now” and which sum up perfectly the point I am trying to get across: “When you surrender to what is and so become fully present, the past ceases to have any power. You do not need it anymore. Presence is the key. The Now is the key.” (Tolle 229).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Poem About Insanity

Lurking Behind Every Corner,
Is Insanity.

A Drug Cocktail Keeps It At Bay,
Prevents The Hallucinations,
Delusions and Paranoia.

Is My Fractured Mind Any Less Of My Mind?
I still Possess the Memories,
Of Skeletal Arms, and Millions of Dollars.

But What Do These Memories Mean?
If Anything?
A Semblance of Insight.

Insight Into The Darkest Recesses Of My Brain,
Oh My Fractured Mind,
How You Spilled Your Guts.

Dreams and Desires,
Laced In Paranoia,
I Suddenly Realized The Truth.

I Wait For It To Disappear Once More,
Everyday,
My Sanity.

A Poem About Manic Psychosis

Racing Thoughts,

Thoughts Disjointed,

Spinning A Tale of Non-Reality.

 

A Rush Of Euphoria,

A State of Bliss,

Can Anything Get Better Than This?

 

Up So High,

Looking Down Below,

At Logic Left Behind.

 

Thoughts Racing,

Spinning A Tale Of Non-reality,

Until the Psych Ward Becomes A Reality.

 

Hallucinations, Delusions,

They Become My Friends,

Comforts Me When My Mind Refuses To Bend.

 

The Ego Implodes,

Lets Loose It’s Desires,

Am I Phantom Or A Vampire?

 

Neither, I am Lying Here,

In A Hospital Bed,

Where Abilify Brings Back The Sharp Memory…

 

That None Of This,

None Of This,

Was Ever Real.

Stop Doing That Sh*t – A second look at Gary John Bishop’s Self-help Book

stop doing that shit 2

“You got yourself to this point in your life, and I’m going to show you how you subconsciously did it. How you fucked yourself. And how to dig yourself out” (Bishop 53).

Gary John Bishop boldly states that he can show you how to unfuck yourself in his self-help book titled “Stop Doing That Sh*t.” He does so by making you more conscious of the “three saboteurs” he claims are the conclusions you’ve made in life about three things: Yourself, Others and Life. Bishop states, “They skew everything. Contort everything. And ultimately burden you with the life you currently have. The one you’re trying to change” (Bishop 114).

We’ll start by discussing the first saboteur – conclusions you have made about yourself. Your conclusion about yourself always begins with an “I” and is stuff like the following:

“I’m not smart enough”
“I’m a loser”
“I’m different”
“I don’t matter”
“I’m incapable”
“I’m not loved” or even all the way down the hole to “I’m worthless.”

Bishop asks the important question, “So what have you concluded about yourself?” and I’ll be honest when I was forced to answer this question I felt extremely uncomfortable and shocked at the answers that so readily flew out of my brain. Things I did not even realize I was holding on to about myself. The conclusions I had made about myself were all negative and I started to realize why my life seems as unhappy as it does. If I was holding on to these things in my subconscious, it was no wonder I was sabotaging myself because clearly I did not think very highly of myself or thought I deserved better. Below is my conclusions about myself:

I have concluded that I am worthless. My personal conclusion is that I am not smart enough to cut it in life and I am not capable of having a job let alone a career. Also I struggle socially with the conclusion that I am different from others because I have bipolar disorder and have experienced a few psychosis. I feel I am not smart enough to hold down a job because I have been fired a few times in my life. I feel I am not capable or smart enough to continue my schooling because in my final year of University I struggled with my mental capacities and things that seemed so easy before like memorization came extremely difficult to me, I know this is backwards logic because I was experiencing my first episode of psychosis ever and previous to this episode had more than excelled at University. I can’t seem to help these conclusions about
myself though, despite trying to look at them objectively and prove them wrong with examples where I did in fact the opposite of what I am concluding.

How could I ever really change my life if I’m rooted in the belief that I am worthless and incapable? Bishop claims in his book that you can have the life you want to live if you willingly choose it: “The good news is if you accept that you made the mess, you are also accepting that you can unmake it. I often have to remind people of their power. It takes as much effort to live a crappy life as it does a great one. And you’re the only one who can choose which you want to live” (Bishop 138). This brings us to one of Bishop’s main arguments for change which is acceptance. He states that we did not ask to be born but rather were thrown into humanity whether we liked it or not and says it is up to us to deal with that fact:

“You had no say in any of this, yet it doesn’t matter if you think its fair. Youre here and you’ll have to deal with it like everyone else before you and everyone after you. This is where the road to peace of mind begins. Acceptance. Acceptance is the gateway to real change” (Bishop 73). Bishop then goes on to say releasing blame is fundamental for real change: “the single most important thing you can do for your life is to release anyone (including yourself!) from blame for how your life has turned out. Even if you were thrown into the worst circumstances, it’s your choice now to turn your life around, make it better, learn and grow and break free of where you came from.”(Bishop 87).

I realized a lot of the pain I was feeling in life was due to not accepting things for what they were. I laid on a couch for six months in the deepest depression I had ever experienced because I could not let go of the notion that I had not completed my Bachelor’s degree. I would not accept it and instead wallowed into a self-inflicted state of despair over never finishing my degree. I wasted six months of my life pitying myself when I could have said “Yes, that happened but now what?” I could have started to make moves to get back to my education or even to find something new to strive for and change my life for the better instead of getting stuck in it, in my mind of “I’m worthless.”

But I digress, to the second saboteur which is the conclusions you make about others. This second saboteur, your conclusion about others could be anything: People are stupid, untrustworthy, a threat, unreliable, uncaring, selfish, cruel, manipulative, untrustworthy, etc.

I have determined that the conclusions I have made about others are that they are selfish, a threat, and untrustworthy, and that people will always leave. Because of my experiences as a child with selfish parents who cared more about the bottle or their gambling addiction than making sure I was properly brushing my teeth or looked after. I also concluded people were untrustworthy at a young age when I told a friend a secret in confidence that she then disclosed to a teacher and the police got involved. Losing my father during adolescence and the trail of exes I have has led me to conclude people always leave as well.

This brings us to the third and final saboteur, arguably one of the most important which is the conclusions you make about life. Bishop asks “How do you feel about life?” (Bishop 157). He claims that “deep down in your subconscious, there resides a life conclusion:

“life is hard”
“life is complicated”
“life is a struggle”
“Life is too much” (Bishop 158).

I conclude that life is unfair and a constant struggle. I concluded this after working my ass off all through elementary and high school to prepare for University. I got to University and struggled to make ends meet while supporting myself at school. I excelled at school for three years of my undergraduate then had a mental breakdown leading to the diagnosis of bipolar disorder. I concluded life was unfair when I had this breakdown
because I realized then I would always struggle with a mental disorder for the rest of my life because of what, roll of the genetic dice.

I looked around me and everyone seemed to be thriving mentally whereas I was a disaster. I had to drop out of school, the only thing I was ever good at when I found the things like studying and memorizing facts became too difficult shortly after my first psychotic break with reality. I concluded life was unfair because some stupid mental illness took everything away from me, my sanity and then the only thing I could depend on in life or felt like I could- my education.

Bishop states: “Its what you have concluded about life that has you stuck in a certain place” (Bishop 160) then continues to elaborate: “You don’t have problems! You have your problems! The perfect issues , specific to you, that allow you to continue with this daily absurdity. And that’s what it is. Absurd. Your whole fucking life is absurd now. All because you’ve told yourself that life can’t be any different from what you have come to believe” (Bishop 162).

So what can we do to get unstuck?

Bishop claims acceptance is the key: “Stop the striving and struggling, for starters, and just accept where you are. Be “here” for the moment. This moment” (Bishop 186). He also argues for a future-oriented lifestyle in which the actions you take each day lead to the future you want. He talks about the “limitless potential” one has when they let go of their past and look to the future. He says to accept that your conclusions are a part of who you are but in essence not to become them: “Remember this is not about stopping self-sabotaging behaviors on their own but instead designing a future that compels you to fill your life with new actions, new outcomes – in short, a new life” (Bishop 217).

Bishop asks his readers to ponder the following questions and imagine a future worth living, “Imagine the kind of work you’ll do a year from now, the relationships you’ll have, the lifestyle you’ll live?  What actions are you taking today to reveal that future? Now look at this present moment of time. What actions are you taking right now to reveal that future?” (Bishop 223)

I realized through my conclusions that I have been holding on to the past and that it’s time to focus more on the future through the present moment. I can start today to make small steps towards building the future that I dream of. In the future I am back at school but this time instead of studying Art History and English, I am specializing in Curating. I have already done the research and found a University close to home which offers such a program. Now I need to work towards financially getting myself there which means I really aught to start looking for a job. The steps I can take today to slowly get myself to where I need to be is to apply to jobs. I also imagine myself as a driver in the future and so need to seriously buckle down and save for and attend driver’s Ed. In the future I also imagine myself back at my ideal weight and today I can take the small step of a bike ride and incorporate exercise into my daily life from here on out. I will no longer be a slave to my doubts rooted in the past and focus on the here, this moment, and what I can achieve to gradually get to where I want to be.

In “Stop Doing That Sh*t,”  Bishop hits you right between the eyes with the truth: “Do you know what life really is? It’s an opportunity for you to play with the skinbag you were given. To try it out, to take it for a ride, to work that thing to its very limit, to live this life before you fucking die. The certainty you’ve been craving? That’s it right there. You’ll die” (Bishop 226).

The fact of the matter is we are all going to die one day and if you waste your moments worrying or get caught up in something that was or never will be, you re bound to get stuck in your life. You might as well work towards something and if it takes you longer than anticipated to get there, so be it. You’re working on it, and that’s what’s key.

Bishop ends his book with probably one of the best questions you could ask and I am going to end my blog on this note: “Fuck the past, reveal a bold future, step out there and get into action. Deal with yourself. The future has arrived. Now what the hell are you going to do about it?” (Bishop 227).

 

 

Life Update

mermaidtings

I have been reading a lot of self-help books lately (you can catch the reviews on my blog) and have noticed a common theme – embracing the NOW. I have decided to try and be more present in my life and live each moment as if it will be my last cause ultimately who knows what’s next right? I want to do things in the moment that my future self can benefit from and will be proud to know I did. For example, starting now I am going to make a more conscious effort to go to the gym and exercise. I have also decided to try taking up my half marathon training again. Granted it will probably be a slow start but everyone needs to start somewhere.

I want to focus more on the things I enjoy like reading, bike riding, longboarding, etc. I need to stop making excuses like “Oh, I can get around to doing that later.” The time is now and I need to start acting like it. I also need to let go of my past and conclusions I have made about myself throughout these twenty six odd years of life. I refuse to be a victim to my past and am taking my power back.  So what if I had two psychotic breaks? It doesn’t mean I should avoid people and treat myself like a leper. I want to get to the point where I am applying for jobs and starting to build a life for myself again. I know this will take time and some much needed work on myself (that’s what all the self-help books are for!)

My main priority in this point in time, in this now, is my health. I mentioned earlier in “The Pitfalls of Bipolar Disorder” that it had been five years since I had been to a dentist and that I finally went to get an exam done on my teeth. The verdict is in – they’re fucked up! But anyways I have already started work on them and had two cleaning appointments with freezings – that means those needles I have been avoiding I finally confronted. I am sincerely proud of myself because I am irrationally afraid of the dentist thus the five year hiatus. I have to have a bazillion fillings , however, which means more needles for me, Yay! NOT. But rather than shrink away or avoid it like I used to do I have decided to face it head on.

I also need to have oral surgery to remove four of my wisdom teeth. Now the idea of surgery would scare the shit out of me but rather than let my anxiety spiral me into a deep depression like I used to, I have decided to use some logic thinking and coping skills to overcome it. I am distracting myself with positive things like going to the movies,  going for a jog, or reading a book until doom’s day. I am also thinking it through rationally, “Everyone gets their wisdom teeth out and they survived. You will feel discomfort for a week or so but you will be fine and ultimately survive this.”

Another aspect of my health I am working on is my smoking. As you have read in my previous blog posts I am now sober from marijuana going on four months! But I have become a horrible chain smoker to cope with this. I have decided it’s finally time to let go of yet another filthy habit. I will be going to my first appointment this Wednesday with a smoking cessation counsellor and will begin my journey to quit smoking officially next week. I have tried quitting before and only ended up smoking again but this time I am more motivated and have quitting pot under my belt already so I feel more confident I can handle this.

In general, I just want to be more mindful of what I am thinking and doing in my life. I want to look back on my life and know I lived every moment to its fullest potential. I will start engaging in more activities geared towards improving my physical and mental health this month and hope to make a habit of it. I know this won’t be easy but I think I am finally up to the challenge. Can you teach an old dog new tricks? Well I sure as hell plan to fucking find out.

Stay Tuned for more updates! And a fun thing I have decided is that I am not too old for Halloween this year! I was struggling with my age and whether or not it is appropriate still to dress up and go out. I have decided “fuck it! you only live once!” I am being a mermaid ergo the picture at the top of this blog post of me in costume.

Live in the Now and Cut yourself a break every once in awhile. Your past does not define you. It is up to you to live in THIS moment and OWN it.

Stop Doing That Sh*T

stop doing that shit

”Someone once asked me, “What’s at the core of every human being?” “Bullshit I replied.”

Gary Bishop, though kind of insulting, leads his reader in with this opening line of his second self-help book to “Unfuck Yourself,” titled “Stop Doing That Sh*t  – End Self-Sabotage and Demand Your Life Back.” His straight between the eyes honesty , though highly humorous, effectively gets his point across and with a few choice expletives stops you in your tracks and forces you to think about and reflect upon your life. I enjoyed this book more than its predecessor “Unfuck Yourself” by a factor of ten.

Bishop descries his book and its intent in the first chapter, “…This book is a short , intense jolt to your way of thinking. I’m not out to give you all the answers here. Your answers will come from you…This is more a catalyst, providing questions and ways of looking at things that will spark something in you and cause you to take on your life in a new way.” (Bishop 9).

It is Bishop’s questions that he poses in this book that have you and had me examine my life more closely and understand what was at the root of the problem. He also proposes a new way of looking at things that are more future oriented and that abandon the past or rather accept it and move forward (which we will get into more later). Bishop states that this book began with him asking a simple question, “Why?”

“Why is my life the way it is?” (Bishop 31).

He then asks the reader to stop and consider these questions for themselves, “Why do you do what you do? Think. If you keep living this way, where is it all headed? Not some wispy concept of your future but rather a down-in-the-dirt look at where your
current actions are leading you ” (Bishop 32).

I reflected on these questions and concluded my future looked bleak if I were to continue with the actions I take on a regular day-to-day basis. If I am being honest with myself I do what I do to avoid pain or discomfort. I chain smoke because it feels good and alleviates my boredom but this action will inevitably lead to a future that I am not in, because I will ultimately have died from lung cancer like my father. I eat sugary snacks and sugary drinks knowing its harming my teeth in the long run and causing weight gain that I do not like because in the moment it feels good.

All my actions are about instant gratification and I am starting to realize as this book is causing me to reflect on what I do and why I do it, that I am no better than a child. I spend my money quicker then I get it, on trivial things like new brand name clothing or the latest self-help book (I actually lent this one out from the library, Go Me!). The point is  I spend literally all my money instead of putting even a small portion away because I like the instant gratification that comes with a new purchase. This is going to lead to a future where I am constantly living check to check struggling to make ends meet and never really properly managing my money. I  know if I continue to be a slave to instant pleasure, I will have a bleak future indeed. One where I am fat, broke, and my teeth are rotting out of my head.

Bishop writes, “There’s no end to the possibilities you’ve written off with nothing more than a series of auto-response triggers in the confines of your head.
“it’s too hard”
“It won’t work”
“I can’t do it”
“I don’t know enough”
“There’s no point. It won’t make any difference” (Bishop 43).

We all do it, don’t lie. Write ourselves off before even trying. I know currently I’ve been constantly writing myself off. Writing off applying to jobs or going to job interviews because I believe “I can’t do it or I don’t know enough.” I have also written off something very important to me with those same excuses before even starting and that is to write my memoirs about dealing with bipolar disorder and being hospitalized.

Bishop offers hope in “Stop Doing That Sh*t” though and boldly states, “You got yourself to this point in your life, and I’m going to show you how you subconsciously did it. How you fucked yourself. And how to dig yourself out” (Bishop 53).

So buckle in Fuckers, and read my next blog post for how to unfuck yourself and stop doing that shit – that self-sabotaging bullshit that holds you back.

Stay Tuned Folks.